I now have a three-week-old daughter and even though I’ve been awake for what feels like twenty-four hours a day for those three weeks, it has been the quickest of my life. I wish I could pause time and stop her growing. She’s grown out of her first baby grow already and it was truly heartbreaking. Motherhood is proving to be the most difficult yet most rewarding challenge I could ever imagine. I could store things in the bags under my eyes they’re that huge (thank goodness for concealer). I regularly think of all the mundane tasks that I never appreciated which have now become the highlight of my week; showering, cooking, getting dressed, brushing my teeth etc. imagine being able to shower without being watched by a tiny human or not having to rush just incase she decides to scream for reasons I will never work out. I struggle to remember how I used to spend my time when I didn’t have a little bundle of joy with which to revolve my days (and nights) around. Everyday she gets more and more alert and lovely and it makes every pooey nappy and sleepless night worth it.
So the long awaited Boxing Day night out had been planned since what feels like the beginning of time. I felt as though I’d left my leg at home or as if I’d gone to a party without my best friend. We spent the entire night stressed. Is she eating? Is she sleeping? I wished I could just text her to check up on her. Instead I pestered my other half’s mother all night for regular updates. The highlight of my night was receiving a text that read ‘ She’s had 5oz and is fast asleep xxx’. However, all in all it was lovely to have a festive night out with my friends and partner. He also just happened to be the DJ for the night and finished his set with ‘Hey There Delilah’. It was a sickeningly cute moment and many tears were shed. However, the morning after was not so cute. Returning to mom duties on my first hangover in nine months proved to be an eye opening experience.
Having a baby at Christmas time is a strange thing. Amongst all the festivities and visitors it feels like a blur. As of this week that’s all over, the New Year has started and soon my partner will have to return to work and I’ll be left to fend for myself on a daily basis with our brand new little family member. Nothing scares me more. Nevertheless, our baby girl will certainly be the best cure for January blues and I couldn’t be more excited for the year ahead with my new little family.